LETZBYONEST #1: CELEBRITY “SEX TAPEZ” RULE…

LETZBYONEST:

images-11“HOLLYWOOD CELEBRITYizm” IZ THE 2ND MOST ADDICTING THING TO MANKIND ON THE WORLD WIDE WEB NEXT TO PORN. WE ALL HAVE A HOW MANY 13 TO 75 YEAR OLD PERVERTS, INCLUDING MYSELF, SEARCH FOR WAYS TO SEE AS MANY NAKED WOMEN AS POSSIBLE, EVERYDAY. CHAT ROOMS, VIP SITES AND USELESS JUNK SITES (along with so many sites i couldn’t even begin to name four percent of them) SPEND COUNTLESS AMOUNTS OF HOURZ VIDEOING AND UPLOADING SCENE AFTER SCENE OF FUCKING, BLOWING AND SQUIRTING.. IT’S MAGIC,

1_thumb_paris_hilton_nude_2MEANWHILE, WE PATHETIC MORTALS SIT AROUND AND WATCH “ACCESS HOLLYWOOD” AND “ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT” WONDERING WHAT EVERY “REALITY CELEBRITY” IS DOING WITH THEIR PERSONAL LIVES. WHAT CLUB IS BRITNEY VISITING IN PARIS? WHAT NEW “BOY TOY” IS PARIS PARADING AROUND WITH; NOT TO MENTION HER SPECIAL BFF. LINDSAY LOHAN AND SAMANTHA RONSON ARE ON CONSTANT ROTATION ON EVERY LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW. JOKES AND SPOOFS, GALORE; MY BLOG INCLUDED. THUS, TAKE SEXXY CELEBRITIES, MAKE A PORN WITH THEM AND UPDATE IT ON THE WEB. YOU HAVE THE COOLEST PHENOMENON, EVER!! CELEBRITY SEX TAPES…..

NAME A FEMALE CELEBRITY. OKAY, PICK ANOTHER ONE NOW. GOOGLE HER NAME. NOW, GOOGLE HER NAME AND ADD NUDE NEXT TO IT. YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU WILL FIND. PURE AMAZEMENT, I ASSUME. IT’S FUCKIN SPECTACULAR. REMEMBER THE GIRL FROM AMERICAN PIE? ALYSON HANNIGAN, I BELIEVE.

51“AND THEN THIS ONE TIME @ BAND CAMP…”

SEX TAPE… YEAH SHE TOOK IT ON CAMERA AND “SOMEHOW” IT GOT LEAKED TO THE PUBIC, OOPS, I MEAN THE PUBLIC. KIM KARDASHIAN AND RAY J.. SEXTAPE. LINDSAY LOHAN, BRITNEY SPEARS. SEX TAPE. SEX TAPE. FUCKIN DUSTIN DIAMOND aka “SCREECH” FROM THE HIT SHOW “SAVED BY THE BELL” HAS A SEXTAPE. ANYONE PEEPED OUT THE ABI TITMUSS JOINTS; MUST SEE, AMERICA. MUST SEE.

I AKNOWLEDGE THAT IT IS A PUBLICITY STUNT 9/10 TIMES, BUT I DON’T THINK ANY OF US GIVE TWO SHITS. THE FANTASY OF BEING NAKED WITH MEGAN FOX DEFINITELY MAKES MY DICK HARD. (well done Brian Austin Green; watch you back brotha.. i loveĀ  your woman…) TELL ME YOU DON’T HAVE A SECRET CRUSH ON SOME FEMALE CELEBRITY FROM BACK IN THE DAY. HELLO, SAMANTHA MICELLI IS SUPER DUPER SEXXY, STILL. (that’s Alissa Milano for all you idiots. Who’s The Boss, Duh).

OF COURSE, I CHECK TMZ, THE SUPERFICIAL AND BYONESTINVAZION TO SEE THE “NORMAL” CELEBRITY BUSINESS. ON THE OTHER HAND, (i use my left; it feels like someone’s doing it for me that way.) I WANNA SEE NAKED SLUTS, PERIOD. CHECK BASHFULMONKEY.COM FOR ME AND TELL ME HOW MUCH FUN YOU HAVE. PAY SITES MAKE AN ASS LOAD (no pun intended… okay, a little bit) OF MONEY OFF CARMEN ELECRA’S VAGINA. BELIEVE ME, I KNOW..

nude_4IN CLOSING STATEMENTS I SAY: MAKE MORE SEX TAPES! WE DISGUSTING SNAKE YANKERS DESERVE AND NEED THAT MADNESS. BEYONCE, GET IT DONE. I HEARD FERGIE GOT DOWN WITH CHICKS. WELL DO US ALL A FAVOR “GLAMOROUS GIRL.” CALL UP ONE OF YOUR GIRLS FROM BACK IN THE DAY, FLY HER TO YOUR PRIVATE CONDO IN LOS SCANDOLOUS. DRINK ON SOME WINE FOR A WHILE AND GET IT DONE.. LONG LIVE “CELEBRITY” SEX TAPES.

ANONYMOUZ

PS. I DO DRUGS. I WANT TO ADD THAT DISCLAIMER SO YOU UNDERSTAND MY BRAIN DOESN’T THINK THIS WAY ON ITZ OWN!

Advertisements

One Response to “LETZBYONEST #1: CELEBRITY “SEX TAPEZ” RULE…”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: