Archive for halle berry

Jennifer Aniston vs. Halle Berry: What is the problem, ladies?

Posted in B.YONEST NEWZ, GOSSIP NEWZ with tags , , , , , on May 3, 2010 by invazion

B.YONEST “Gossip” NEWZ: I mean B.YONEST. What is it about them?

When you think of Halle Berry what comes to mind? You visualize the perfect caramel skin. You see her amazing scene in “Swordfish” and “Monsters Ball” where she’s showing her breasts and having a sexual partaking with “Billy Bob.” No that’s not what you see. Well, that’s just me then. Either way, you see a gorgeous fixture of a woman, a movie star with Awards “up the arse.” What is Halle missing? Let’s talk Jennifer, now.

Jennifer Aniston; One of the most famous women in movies and television. She’s in the “Running Hollywood” section of Los Angeles, California. She gets paid an extensively disgusting amount of dinero to make a movie. Every time she’s on the front cover of a Magazine, they sell like four billion more copies than normal. It’s crazy. She’s gorgeous. The older she gets the younger she looks. Perfection, but she’s missing the same thing Halle’s missing. A MAN.

It blows my mind, people. Neither one of them can keep a man for longer than a couple/few years. Maybe they get bored and want a new man, but it seems that they are the dumpee.. Not the dumper. Halle had baseball players, singers, actors and all in between. After six attempts, she’s in her mid 40’s, gorgeous as ever and walking the beach with her daughter. Does she have too much power thus making her intimidating to men? Does her fame demand too much attention from other men making her “men” insecure.. OR is Halle Berry CRAZY? She is a black girl from Cleveland. I’m just sayin. Anything is possible, right?

Jennifer has to be NUTZO as GUSTO too, huh? That woman has been through John Mayer, Brad Pitt, Brad Pitt’s cousin (just a joke for comedic purposes) and a few more white dudes on the Hollywood Scene. Why can’t she keep a man? Again, it has to be pretty tough to walk hand in hand with Jennifer Aniston, right? Hell to the NAW. You don’t pay for sh*t. You get you “red carpet” on @ Award Shows you aren’t even invited to. What’s wrong with being her man. I’d do it. I’d let my manager do it, fuck it. I can’t figure out why Jennifer Aniston and Halle Berry can’t keep a man, but Nicole Ritchey and Ashlee Simpson can. Let’s talk about it.

ANONYMOUZ

REALITY TELEVISION: IS IT GOING TOO FAR?

Posted in B.YONEST NEWZ with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 24, 2009 by invazion

What seemed to be a 10 minute segway in the late 90’s into the new millennium has become an uproar of weigh loss, relationship hookups and celebrities “looking for love IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES.” Flavor Flav, Ray J and other individuals are milking the reality cow and it’s becoming dissatisfying. For instance, why are Heidi and Spencer famous? No, they are not incredible actors such as Halle Berry and Matt Damon. They didn’t invent anything incredible and they are lacking talent. For some reason, they are all over the air waves and television screens. There are famous individuals and not yet famous individuals who deserve that spotlight SO MUCH more.

There is an individual sitting at home watching hundreds of people on television who have no business on a BLANK screen. Actors and actresses are losing movie roles to singers. I’m all about expanding the brand of ones’ self, but not if it’s going to diminish the Entertainment Brand as a whole. Omarosa is going to have a reality show. Denise Richards has a reality show. The Kardashians’ have a reality show. It’s becoming down right STUPID. I actually find myself somewhat entertained by this shit.

It started w/ Real World. I believe the 1st few series’ had some “reality” involved. Putting a group of kids in the same house and forcing them develop into one co-existing unit. Individuals from different walks of life and such. Great concept. Great concept. Reality television has grown into this spindle of sarcastic bullshit, though. Every show attempts to stretch the bar more than its’ predecessor making the “reality” non existent. Now there are stalkers, domestic abusers and murderers’ among the reality television circuit. Which brings me to my next issue with reality. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?

Are there sophisticated background checks? Does Vh1, MTV, TRU TV, Fox Reality and others screen each and every contestant proficiently. I’m sure there is a screen and maybe a background check, but these people can create a personality for themselves. We may NEVER know who they really are. Jasmine Fiore met her husband and eventual killer, Ryan Alexander Jenkins. He had been in the reality circuit through Vh1’s “Megan Wants A Millionaire” and “I Love Money.” I’m sure Vh1 knew some things about him, but did they know everything? These are questions of concern I have, honestly.

I understand, acknowledge and oblige television networks working diligently to entertain its’ viewers. I REALLY do. I challenge the networks to do the best they can to entertain us in a better way, though. “The Biggest Loser” changes peoples’ lives in a positive way. “America’s Got Talent” (although it has its’ querky side) changes lives in a positive way. Some of these shows I view as “30 minutes of my life I’ll never get back.” Step your games’ up ASS HOLES.

ANONYMOUZ!

81st ANNUAL ACADEMY AWARDS: “OSCARS” the GROUCH!!

Posted in B.YONEST with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 23, 2009 by invazion

AND THE WINNER IS….. another B.O.R.I.N.G. CEREMONY….

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WELL PEOPLES. I DONT KNOW WHERE TO START WHEN IT COMES TO THIS ACADEMY AWARDS SHIT. I FELL ASLEEP SO MANY TIMES ITS RIDICULOUS.

FAMOUS ACTORS AND ACTRESSES. GORGEOUS DRESSES RENTED AND/OR BORROWED FOR THE EVENING. HUGH JACKMAN HOSTING WHILE DELIVERING A WONDERFUL SHOW. I GUESS IT’S YOUR TYPICAL ACADEMY AWARD MADNESS.

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THIS YEARS’ ACADEMY AWARDS SEEMED TO BE A SUCCESS. BORING AS SHIT, BUT A SUCCESS. JENNIFER ANISTON CROSSING PATHS WITH BRAD PITT AND ANGELINA. BILL MAHER PLUGGING HIS PERSONAL DOCUMENTARY OF THE YEAR. NOTHING TOO EXTRAVAGANT TO WRITE ABOUT, BUT I CAN TELL YOU WHAT I DID LEARN WHILE WATCHING THE 81ST ACADEMY AWARDS….

  • I HAVE NO SEEN ENOUGH MOVIES THIS YEAR AT ALL. THERE WERE 5 MOVIES UP FOR BEST PICTURE AND IVE SEEN ZERO OF THEM
  • THE ACADEMY AWARDS IS A BORING ASS CEREMONY
  • THEY HAVE WAY TOO MANY BULLSHIT MUSICAL ESCAPADES
  • ALICIA KEYS IS NOT ATTRACTIVE. SHE’S JUST NOT. B.U.S.T.E.D.
  • NICOLE KIDMAN IS STILL PALE AND KATE WINSLET IS HOT DUDE

meryl-streep_lJUST A FEW THINGS I PICKED UP ON TONIGHT. MERYL STREEP HAS BEEN NOMINATED FIFTEEN FREAKIN TIMES FOR AN AWARD. WHAT THE SHIT? HUGH JACKMAN LINKED MERYL TO THE CURRENT STEROID BUZZ. A WOMAN WHO RECEIVES FIFTEEN NOMINATIONS HAS TO BE ON ENHANCEMENTS. HAS TO BE. THE MOVIES THAT RECEIVED THE MOST ACCOLADES….

  • CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON-BRAD PITT
  • THE DARK KNIGHT-HELL YEAH HEATH LEDGER
  • SLUMDOG VILLLAGE-MOVIE OF THE YEAR
  • MILK-CONGRATULATIONS SEAN PENN
  • THE READER-CONGRATULATIONS KATE WINSLET

ALL IN ALL, IT WAS A PRETTY STANDARD AWARDS CEREMONY. IF I WASNT A WRITER OF CELEBRITY NEWZ, I WOULDN’T HAVE WATCHED PAST THE FIRST 20 MINUTES. SINCE THIS HAS BECOME MY JOB THOUGH…. LONG LIVE THE ACADEMY AWARDS… B.O.R.I.N.G.

ANONYMOUZ (OSCARS the GROUCH)

PS. DID I MENTION I NEED TO SEE MORE FUCKIN MOVIES. IM WAAAAY OUT OF THE MOVIE LOOP…

Best Actress: Kate Winslet, The Reader
Best Supporting Actress: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Best Actor: Sean Penn, Milk
Best Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight

PSS. I COULD MENTION A MILLION THINGS I NOTICED LAST NIGHT, BUT I WAS SO EFFIN BORED TAKIN NOTES I DECIDED.. FUCK IT. EQUAL RIGHTS TO THE “GAYS.” NO PROMO PRODUCTIONS..

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