Happy 4:20 Holiday, World

B.YONEST “Entertainment” NEWZ: Roll it up, light it up, smoke it up

Today embarks on a National Holiday. No a Holiday for the World. It’s 4/20/2010 people.. U know what that means.. It’s “Chief til U Can’t No More” Day. Yep, roll your bleeders, burn your “j’s”, blow your hookah and get ‘er done.. Happy Holiday.. Smoke W**d, EVERYDAY…

ANONYMOUZ

LETZBYONEST #18: MARIJUANA and SHORT TERM MEMORY dont CO-EXIST.

LETZBYONEST:

HOW OFTEN ARE YOU SITTING ON THE COMFY CHAIR IN YOUR FAMILY ROOM AND YOU THINK…

“HOLY SHIT, I NEED TO GO UPSTAIRZ AND GRAB MY _____________.”

YOU TAKE ONE MORE SIP OUT OF YOUR TAHITIAN TREAT, MOVE YOUR LAP TOP OFF YOUR THIGHS AND PLACE IT ON YOUR SPOT. YOU BEGIN WALKING UPSTAIRS AND YOUR BRAIN (obviously) BEGINZ TO DRIFT TO SOME FAR OUT GALAXY. YOU GET TO YOUR BEDROOM DOOR, TWIST THE KNOB (to open your room, stupid) AND WALK INTO YOUR BEDROOM, WITH EXCITEMENT. YOU BEGIN TO DRIFT BACK INTO REALITY, BUT THE PROBLEM IZ WHAT??? YOU FORGOT WHY THE FUCK YOU CAME TO YOUR BEDROOM FOR.

WHO WANTZ TO WALK ALL THE WAY BACKSTAIRZ EMPTY HANDED? NOT TO MENTION, YOU FEEL LIKE A FLIPPPIN’ IDIOT and/or STONER BECUZ THIZ SHIT HAPPENZ TO ME (oops, i mean you) ALL THE TIME. IF IM SITTING AROUND AND SOMETHING POPZ UP IN MY IMMEDIATE MENTAL, I HAVE 2 CHOICEZ.

• WRITE THE SHIT DOWN AND TAKE CARE OF IT TOMORROW OR..

• WASTE MY TIME WALKING INTO THE OTHER ROOM TO SEARCH FOR NOTHING. (when i get there, i will have forgotten what i needed.)

SAD, BUT TRUE, IM A POTHEAD… THE FIRST THING IN DEALING WITH SUCH AN ISSUE IZ ADMITTING IT. I CHIEF, THEREFORE I AM. NORMALLY, IT IZNT AN ISSUE AT ALL, BUT WHEN I NEED TO FIND SOMETHING QUICK FAST or I HAVE AN IDEA OR CONCEPT “IN THE NOW” PRETTY MUCH CHALK IT UP. GONE, POOF, PEACE, SEE YA, CHECK BACK TOMORROW MOST AMAZING THOUGHT OF ALL TIME. COMPLETELY FUNCTIONAL CRONIC CHIEFER; INDEED. REMEMER WHAT I DID EARLIER THIS AFTERNOON; NO FUCKIN’ WAY. YOU TELL ME.

NATURALLY, THE THING FOR US ALL TO DO IS QUIT THIS TRAVESTY AMONG US IMMEDIATELY. PUT THE BONG DOWN. STOP BUYING PAPERS AND BLUNT WRAPS. NO MORE GANJA? YEAH, THAT’S DEFINITELY not THE ANSWER. I SAY GET IT TOGETHER PEOPLE. WE AS A POT SMOKING GROUP NEED TO ASSIST EACHOTHER. IT’S NOT OK. OUR SHORT TERM MEMORIES CANT BE TOO FAR GONE RIGHT. WE JUST LOST ‘EM A SECOND AGO.. THEY SAY THE FIRST THING TO GO WHEN U GET OLD IS THE MEMORY. WELL, IM YOUNG AZ SHIT STILL. YOU TELL ME.. SMOKE WEED, EVERYDAY!! TWICE!

ANONYMOUZ

PS.. .LUCKILY FOR UZ ALL, THE SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS IS SHORT TERM… KEEP PUFFIN AND FORGETTIN U DID; WELL @ LEAST UNTIL U REMEMER TO PUFF AGAIN. BELOW IS A LISTS OF SIDE EFFECTS AND THE ARTICLE I PLAGERIZED, IF  YOU WILL.. HAHAHAHAHA..

MARIJUANA DANGERS (click here for more article information)

• Impaired perception
• Diminished short-term memory
• Loss of concentration and coordination
• Impaired judgement
• Increased risk of accidents
• Loss of motivation
• Diminished inhibitions
• Increased heart rate
• Anxiety, panic attacks, and paranoia
• Hallucinations
• Damage to the respiratory, reproductive, and immune systems
• Increased risk of cancer
• Psychological dependency

LETZBYONEST #3: McDONALDS, WENDY’S, BURGER KING, ETC: YUCK NASTY

LETZBYONEST:

AMERICA IS FULL OF FAT ASSES. ONE MORE TIME… AMERICA IS FULL OF FAT ASSES. I WENT TO THE GROCERY STORE YESTERDAY AND SAW MORE FAT ASS PEOPLE THAN NORMAL, HEALTHY LOOKING INDIVIDUALS. EVERY AISLE I WALKED DOWN HAD AT LEAST 4 FAT ASS ALIENS; MAYBE 2 HEALTHY FIT HUMANS.

I UNDERSTAND WHOLE FOODS IS THE GROCERY/SPECIALTY STORE FOR HEALTH FREAKS, BUT SO WHAT. WHEN I WALK IN KROGER I SHOULDN’T BE APPAULED BECAUSE EVERYONE IN THERE IS A “FAT ASS” WITH 2 “FAT ASS KIDS” FOLLOWING THEM. WHAT DO I BLAME??? BESIDES LAZY, COMPLACENT, IRRITATED WITH REALITY PARENTS… I BLAME FAST FOOD RESTAURANTS.(picure above right is a little boy eating @ mcdonalds. entitled fat boy on google…I’M JUST SAYIN…)

DON’T GET ME WRONG PEOPLE , PLEASE.. I LOVE A TACO FROM TACO BELL MORE THAN THE NEXT MAN. I EAT MY FAIR SHARE OF DOUBLE STACKS FROM WENDYS AND IF YOU THINK I DON’T SMASH ON APPLE PIES FROM McDONALDS, YOU ARE AN IDIOT. (2 for a dollar, HELLO.) THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND I, YOU WONDER?

• FIRST AND FOREMOST: MY METABOLISM IS SO FUCKIN HIGH IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT I EAT. I KNOW, YOU’RE A HATER.
• SECONDLY: I WORKOUT. I GO TO THE GYM. I RUN ON A TREADMILL. I PLAY BASKETBALL. I SWEAT, IDIOTS.
• THIRD: I SMOKE WEED. I HAVE NO CLUE WHAT THIS DOES, BUT TRY IT. IT MAY HELP YOU LIKE IT HELPS ME. SMOKE WEED, EVERYDAY!

IT’S EXTREMELY DISGUSTING TO SEE A MAN IN THE BURGER KING DRIVE THRU WHO COULD BARELY FIT IN HIS DRIVER SEAT. HIS NECK WAS SWEATING LIKE A MAN RUNNING A MARATHON IN A FAT SUIT. HIS CHOLESTEROL LEVELS HAD TO BE SO HIGH. THE CRAZY THING IS HE STILL SPENT 12 MINUTES IN THE DRIVE THRU LINE INSTEAD OF GETTING OUT OF HIS CAR AND WALKING IN. HIS FOOD WOULD’VE BEEN READY MUCH QUICKER. NOT ONLY THAT, BUT HE WOULD HAVE GOTTEN HIS ONLY EXERCISE FOR THE DAY; WALKING INTO THE RESTAURANT. AMAZING, HUH?

THE WORSE PART IS NONE OF HIS IMMEDIATE FRIENDS OR FAMILY HAVE TOLD HIM “GET YOUR FAT ASS TO A GYM BEFORE YOU DON’T MAKE IT ANOTHER YEAR.” I’M JUST SAYIN.

IF OUR FRIENDS ARE ALCOHOLICS, WE DO WHATEVER WE CAN TO ASSIST THEM IN QUITTING SUCH AN ACT. IF THEY ARE ADDICTED TO METH, WE AGAIN DO WHATEVER WE COULD TO MAKE THEM PUSH THAT DEMON TO THE SIDE. WHY IS AN ADDICTION TO  FOOD ANY DIFFERENT. YOUR FRIENDS SHOULD BE JUST AS ASHAMED AS YOU ARE EVERY MORNING YOU STARE IN THE MIRROR. SOMEONE NEEDZ TO TELL YOU “ITZ NOT OK!” WHY NOT ME… STOP STUFFING YOUR FACES. INSTEAD, STUFF GYM BAGS WITH CLOTHES, DEODORANT AND A JUMP ROPE. THE REST IS IN YOUR HANDS, FAT PEOPLE.. KEEP IT MOVIN

ANONYMOUZ

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